29 February 2012

He asked THE question

Yesterday after soccer practice, in what seemed like random timing, Munchkin asked THE question I've been anticipating him asking for the past 2 years.

I've been honestly answering questions since he was able to talk. "Why does Daddy live in Baltimore?". "Because Daddy is from Baltimore and works there". "Why doesn't daddy come live with us?" "Because daddy's job is in Baltimore". Simple, honest answers that I pray his 3 year old mind can understand.

But this....

"Mom, why did daddy leave us".

Preceded by "I'm still praying for Daddy".

I wasn't prepared to respond.

I know my reaction feeds a lot in to how he reads a situation, so I calmly asked "would you like to call daddy and ask him that question?". "No".

That's the best response I could give at that time. Just as I share the excitement of his life with his dad, his straight A's and soccer practice, I also share these moments I have to witness. These difficult moments where for that moment I feel like I'm not enough.

Ummm.....that's it? Am I the only one not moved by this?

I mean I know my lesson this week is in trust
- so instead of trusting in his response and looking for him to help provide an answer, I am trusting that God will send the answer that is perfect for my little boy to understand.

So the good thing is Munchkin moved right on and didn't seem to dwell on it. The good news is I now know he notices. I now know his little heart is wondering what's up. So I can prepare. I'm not interested in telling him made up fairy tales. I'm interested in telling him the truth, in a way his 3 year old mind can wrap itself around, in a way that respects his dad. What that is - I'm not sure.

1 comment:

  1. Children are always thinking even though they don't always share those thoughts with us. That is one thing that I had to learn when I was going through a difficult time in our family too. Those questions come up and it hurts your heart but I do believe that understand better than we think. It is easy to understand LOVE and HURT unfortunately in this world. Stay in constant prayer that the Lord will give you the answers.


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